By now we had officially coined the term “Candy Dish” as meaning anything that identifies you as a Medicare Card Member. We don’t even say, “That’s so Candy Dish” anymore. We just faintly whisper “Candy Dish” under our breath when the other one says or does something that qualifies for this distinction.
Some of these are easy, others, not so much. The low hanging fruit includes writing a check. Really? Who has not stood in a grocery store line only to see someone ahead of you pull out a checkbook and begin the endless process as the entire line groans in unison. Recently a “streaming series” AKA a television show, included a scene in which a teenager watches an older woman take out a checkbook and begin to write a check. The girl asks, “What are you drawing?” The answer is really, modern hieroglyphics. The corollary to this is, “Bounce a check.” At best, it sounds like a basketball technique. If you think checks date you, get ready, credit card antiquity is lurking in the wings. If Venmo sounds like a planet on Star Trek, you may need to re-evaluate your monetary universe
Phones are the great generational divide. Landlines are kryptonite to younger generations. “Why is the phone tied to your desk, wall, table?” I have been asked this question, more than once. If you say, “I dialed your number” or worse, “I’ll fax you,” you have just received your first Candy Dish. If your landline still offers a busy signal then you are not even a Candy Dish, you belong in the “Riveting and Rationing” generation. For those unclear about this, that would be Rosie The Riveter and food/gas rationing. Super Candy Dish.
Part of phone culture is the app. I am embarrassed that early, but not that early, in the introduction and worldwide acceptance of apps in our daily lives I had the following exchange with my wife. I was looking for a feature to get better weather predictions on my phone that required an app. The exchange went as follows: Wife, “I’ll get it for you at the app store.” Me, “No that’s okay, I don’t want you to have to go out.” Peals of laughter ensued. I learned about apps that day.
Television isn’t television anymore. It’s anything with a screen so the old models and language no longer apply. If you say “When is it on?” or “I’ll tape it for you”, fill up the candy dish, you have arrived.
Candy Dish has opened up a whole new window into the past but the shock is I am still living with a foot in both worlds. This makes my generation conflicted as we live both lifestyles, many times, awkwardly. Like looking for an app to tell me my candy dish is almost empty.
If you look forward to getting your physical mail everyday and do so by driving your stick shift car to the post office after checking your voice message machine while thinking about your “Christmas Card List” and wearing a “sport coat” you may want to stock up on candy for the next Holiday Season. You will need it.